March 25, 2022


  Been a while since I’ve offered an update. (Checks notes…) Wow, two years almost to the day. Wow. Well not much has happened since March 2020. *shrugs…

  Since then I have completed Chasing Stars, my page one rewrite of Launch.

  It’s an entirely different book, written for the reader instead of the author. It turned out so well, that I’ve decided to work on the rest as well. Things have changed for me, I’ve stopped smoking weed again, starting to live a lot healthier again, even resigned myself to taking ADHD medication and it’s made a big difference. Now that I’ve finally caught up with all of the things I let slide and pile up before I stopped with the weed, I now have a lot more time and energy to devote to my writing.

  Chasing Stars turned out so well, that I’m kind of newly impressed with my own writing. The contrast is immense; my skill has so dramatically improved. So much so that I’m starting to have the heart to take another run at trying to get published again. It’s soul crushing effort, and I’m not ready yet, but I think I will be. I think what I’ve written is very good. I think what I’ve created and continue to create matters in some small but real way, but I have a lot of work to do.

  I’ve conceived the last book of the six part series. I had that ‘aha’ moment of figuring out what it is going to be about, what it’s heart and core will be, and I’m very excited to get around to writing it and tying so many threads together in such a satisfying way. It’s going to be the best thing I’ve ever done.

  But I also have to admit that I’ve put a lot of crap out there. The quality of my writing now makes me outright embarrassed by what I have out there now. The whole point of Chasing Stars was to create a more palatable introduction to the New Horizon series, and it so very much is, so much so that it pains me that the original is still out there.

  My plan, is to pull it all down. I intend to take down the original novels from every sales channel I set up and go quiet for a while. It’s such a herculean task, but I intend to write it all as one giant six part series. Everything I’ve written, if you include Chasing Stars and exclude Launch, is about 418 000 words, about a lord of the rings trilogy. It is in reality 6 individual stand alone books telling two distinct stories, which all add up to one connected expansive epic. I plan to complete that vision.

  It will take me years. Chasing Stars is in good shape, and I am currently editing the fourth ‘Reunion’ as a precursor to finally completing the fifth book ‘Contact’, which I left only two thirds finished when I originally gave up writing. In the spirit of Chasing Stars, I will also probably try to come up with better titles for them. Books 2 and 3, ‘Midway’, and ‘Arrival’ are both I think in pretty good shape, but will nonetheless require some substantial editing, if not a complete rewrite like Launch.

   

  That leaves me with one complete book, one and a half books to write fresh, and three books requiring deep edits. I can do this.

  I will put some effort into trying to get traditionally published, but I won’t consider myself successful or a failure depending on this. I think what I’ll have will be good enough for that, but the nature of gatekeepers means that like pretty much everything else, it’s hardly a meritocracy.

  I anticipate having to go more the indie route. I’m reconnecting and consulting with my uncle who is also a science fiction novelist, and it’s neat to have him to bounce ideas off of and hear about his experience doing it indie as things have developed since I gave up. I can exchange edits and reviews with other authors and source independent artists for the covers, etc etc. I’m still happy to do the digital and print formatting myself, but… this is all a ways away. I have so muck work to do. Fortunately the ADHD medication makes it easier to focus. Still, I anticipate (ambitiously) this taking me 2 to 3 years to have polished drafts of all six.

  After that, who knows… but that’s kind of exciting too.

  Since my books will be off the market, I think I will post them in their entirety here on this website, not as downloads, but as individual page chapters like in the samples I already have here. I’d still like them to be available if anyone wants to read them, and it can’t hurt to be ‘discoverable’. As I work on them, I will update them here as well and keep it relatively current with their current state, making additional blog posts on my progress as I go. If anyone reads this, and reads any of the books I post here, I would absolutely welcome your feedback and thoughts on how they're developing! Obviously you don't need to bother with typos and such, but as far as how the story develops and pacing and structure stuff, nothing would make me happier than good feedback like that as I'm working through it here.

  This is important to me. I really feel as though there is something special in what I am creating. I believe I am already a strong and talented writer, and that the more I write I only get better and better. The worlds I create feel real, the characters feel like real people, not just to me, but to the people who read them. They could so easily be made into wonderful movies.

  And maybe that’s the thing. Maybe I fell out of love with my work when I thought it wouldn’t be that hard to get published and I failed. Maybe I failed with all the wrong intentions and motivations. With my ego now swept away I’ve been able to fall in love with the work again, with the people and worlds I’ve created. I want to create for the sake of creating again, and just want to share it with people more than I hope for other rewards for it.

  This is going to be something special when I’m done.

  It already is.